Pita chips are flame-kissed and twice-baked, and Aries is a cardinal fire sign that might benefit from smoking.
Taurus is the zodiac's potato—versatile, reliable, thick, and long-lasting. We're lazy because we're always seeking for the easy way to pleasure.
Pringles has changed its name from potato chips to potato crisps and added varieties like prawn and blueberry to suit taste and taxes.
Cancers are reluctant to change and sentimental, hence the Funyun formula has stayed unaltered since 1969.
SunChips attempted hard to portray itself as "green" but has subsequently retracted their biodegradable bag program.
Arch West, a Virgo, developed Doritos. West was buried with corn chip triangles. Flour rest.
Libra is polished and seeks to preserve the peace to avoid upsetting or losing appetite. The original Lays potato chip suits most people's demands.
Scorpio controls the genitalia, and this package of potato chips from Lithuanian manufacturer Chazz promises a unique taste.
Cheetos Cheshire Cheetah reminds me of a classic Sagittarius man: no trousers, sunglasses 24/7, billiard hall regular
Captain Ahab, replete with whale bone prostheses, clinched teeth, and ruthlessness, is my Capricorn archetype.
Aquarians are used to being eccentric and criticized. Hot air ballooning, lycra, and kale chips take years to catch on.
Pisces, the zodiac's last sign, embodies all previous signs' energies. Jupiter, the spacious, more-is-merrier planet, rules Pisces.